DDR Mix: Story Time
by Dekadeci
Summary: A parody of DDR: Mario Mix, where there are no minigames, the game itself is poked at, the main protagonist can't speak, and Waluigi actually has a good reason to own the Music Keys!
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I don't own DDR: Mario Mix's intellectual property, but I do own a copy of the game!

Note: This is a rather short prologue. All the chapters will also be shorter than average (I think).

Note 2: This is a parody. In this story, there are no minigames, video game stereotypes will be ridiculed, and there will be some humour (I hope). 

* * *

**Prologue**

Five worlds floated above the Mushroom Kingdom, all set up to illustrate one of the more bizarre storylines of the Mario franchise. By then, Mario was already highly paid by Shigeru Miyamoto and whoever else did the Mario games. So were Bowser, Luigi, Donkey Kong, Wario, and Peach. The others didn't get paid so highly, as they didn't show up as often.

Mario was currently setting up temporary residence in World 1, along with Toad and Waluigi. Toad was told to guard the Music Keys in the Truffle Towers in World 1, but he was supposed to leave a fatal flaw: Waluigi could immediately gain entry at any time. And you know what Waluigi's intentions are like…

…Well, actually, you don't. Waluigi was coming to the Truffle Towers for a legitimate reason: the Music Keys were offered in his dead great-uncle's will. Waluigi just desired to get what was rightfully his, after all.

Anyway, Waluigi entered the Truffle Towers and got all four of the Music Keys out. He kept one for himself, gave one to Wario (his brother), and left the two others with a Blooper and a Freezie that Wario owed money to.

Unfortunately, as expected, Toad was _very_ upset. "MARIOOOOO!" he screamed. "You've got to hear about this!"

Mario raised his head, but was still silent.

"Did you hear me?" Toad asked.

Mario nodded, but still stayed mute.

"Can you speak?" Toad bothered further.

Mario wrote about non-speaking protagonists as a reply.

"Can you dance?" Toad asked meekly.

Mario nodded again.

"Good, because we need to call up the _S. S. Brass_. It only replies to dancing. Then again, everything does," Toad explained.

Mario soon did a tarantella, and the _S. S. Brass_ quickly arrived…and demolished Mario's temporary house.

"Oops, sorry," Toad apologized. "Well, at least we can get the Music Keys back now…but we need to cross this very inconvenient creek."

Mario figured he could dance across it.


	2. World 1

Disclaimer: I don't own _Carmen_, break dancing, the Truffle Towers, or the _S. S. Brass_. I do own Lakisteven, though.

* * *

**World 1**

Toad searched for a boat that could take them across the creek. Finally, he found a little wooden rowboat with a good supply of paper and pencils in it.

"That's for you, Mario," Toad said as he passed the paper and pencils to Mario.

Mario immediately wrote, "Isn't this a rowboat? Why doesn't it have oars?"

"We dance in it instead of using oars," Toad replied. "Besides, who's dancing?"

"Can I?" Mario wrote.

"Yes, you may," Toad responded.

Mario started dancing a slow waltz.

"We'll never get across at this rate…" Toad complained.

Mario switched to break dancing.

"That's more like it," Toad commented as the boat sailed across the creek and landed on the other bank. Then the boat hit a stone, tipped over, and flung Mario into a hollow stump. Toad also got hurled, but he landed in the creek and swam ashore.

Toad looked down at the hollow stump that Mario landed in. It was as deep as a well, and Toad was worried that Mario could never get out.

"How deep are you?" Toad asked, afraid that Mario broke some bones or something.

Mario signalled his reply back.

"Well, at least you haven't injured yourself," Toad sighed in relief.

Mario showed Toad a new bruise.

"Oh, sorry," Toad replied. "Listen, do you think you can dance your way out?"

Mario started climbing the bark for his response.

"No? Well, try anyway. There's a nice mushroom platform you can dance on."

Mario changed his mind and started ballet dancing. Soon, Mozart's Romantic Symphony started erupting out of the stump.

"Hey, aren't they supposed to be playing another one of Mozart's pieces?" Toad wondered.

When Mario finally jumped out, he felt exhausted. He managed to scribble, "It all started so suddenly!"

"People say that about this symphony," Toad remarked. "How about we rest and go to this shop over there?"

Mario agreed, and the duo headed for the shop.

In the shop, Toad saw a key.

"Isn't that the key to the Truffle Towers?" he muttered. "I've been locked out ever since Waluigi took the Music Keys!"

"Yes, but you're not buying it," the Lakitu shopkeeper responded.

"What's your name?" Toad asked.

"Lakisteven," the green Lakitu replied. "And you're not buying it because you'll need to do something else in order to get it."

"What is it?" Toad asked Lakisteven.

"You'll need to do a favour."

"What sort of favour?"

"You'll have to help me get a decent carrot crop. Those darn Koopa Troopas always pull them out before I can harvest them. Can you please chase them out?"

"Is it harvest time?"

"Coincidentally, yes. And I think they're coming right now!"

Some Koopa Troopas headed for the carrots and started uprooting them.

"That's what I'm talking about," Lakisteven commented. "You want to solve this?"

Toad and Mario nodded, and Mario started doing a scary dance. The Koopa Troopas weren't fazed.

Toad turned on a recording of _Carmen_, and suddenly all the Koopa Troopas scurried out of Lakisteven's farm.

"Classical music always drives teenagers out," Lakisteven proclaimed. "Why hadn't I thought of this before?"

"It's Romantic music," Toad corrected.

"Close enough," Lakisteven responded. "Anyway, for your help, you get this!" He handed Toad the key to Truffle Towers.

"Thank you," Toad thanked.

"You're welcome," Lakisteven replied. "Anyway, want to buy something?"

"No, thanks," Toad answered.

"Well, goodbye!" Lakisteven waved.

"He's one Lakitu that's on our side," Toad murmured when they left the shop.

The two of them soon arrived at the Truffle Towers. Toad used the key and they entered through the doors. Waluigi was surprised to meet them.

"Who expected anyone to live here, let alone me?" Waluigi asked.

"Me," Toad answered.

"Oh sorry," Waluigi responded. "If anyone wants my Music Key, they'll have to face me in a dance-off! And I always win! Wahahahaha!"

"I vote Mario in to represent us," Toad said.

Mario didn't disagree, so he started dancing against Waluigi. Soon, they two of them were dancing decently—until Waluigi got out his secret weapon.

"It's a Bob-omb!" Waluigi announced. "And you can't dance with this exploding in your face!" He set it off, and it exploded—back in Waluigi's face.

"Okay, I can't dance with this in my face," Waluigi took back his last remark. "You win—for now! I'll get that back! Wahahahaha!"

Mario and Toad left with one of the Music Keys.

"Hey, you did know that we have to get three more of those Music Keys, right?" Toad asked Mario.

Mario nodded.

"We'll have to catch the _S. S. Brass_. At least it's over there," Toad pointed out.

Toad and Mario soon hopped into the weird plane-ship and soared off to World 2.


	3. World 2

Disclaimer: I own Lakisteven, but I don't own Talk Like a Pirate Day, Shy Guys, Bloopers, the Music Keys, the Boogie Booster, Cheep Cheeps, or the Cat-o'-Nine-Tails.

* * *

**World 2**

The _S. S. Brass_ was about to drop off Mario and Toad, but Toad intervened and commanded, "We'll steer it. We'll just go over to that building there."

After they arrived at the strangely corkscrew-shaped building, they ran towards a female Toad who was standing outside. She cried, "I'll lose business this way! And I already don't have much!"

"Who does business here?" Toad asked her.

The female Toad replied, "Some Shy Guys do, but they all fear heights so they won't come anymore!"

"Was it once five times shorter or something?" Toad asked.

"It was ten times shorter before," the female Toad answered, and then sobbed into her hands.

"Don't worry. We'll help you get your old hotel back," Toad offered.

A Shy Guy hotel worker came up to Toad and said, "It was caused when my co-worker did a mad dance. Only dancing will fix it now."

Toad replied, "I know I'm not a good dancer, but I know someone who is." He then beckoned Mario, who did an example of his dancing.

"Brilliant! Brilliant!" the Shy Guy congratulated. "He's definitely the man for the job."

Mario did some more tap dancing, and the hotel jumped off its foundation and landed in its old, coiled form.

"Bravo! Bravo!" another Shy Guy cheered as the hotel went back to normal.

"Whew! I thought that was permanent!" his co-worker remarked.

"Thank you so much!" the female Toad thanked.

"It was nothing," Toad responded as he and Mario went back to the _S. S. Brass_.

Toad attempted to steer the _S. S. Brass_ down a whirlpool that held a gleam of a Music Key, but that failed and the ship was spun around. Toad eventually gave up and flew the ship to a nearby shop.

In the shop, Toad and Mario met an old pal.

"Lakisteven! You're here!" Toad exclaimed. "But what's with the pirate outfit?"

"'Tis appropriate for da store and occasion! Yarr!" Lakisteven replied.

"What?" Toad was confused.

"'Tis Talk Like a Pirate Day, arr! Ya mateys never heard of it?" Lakisteven cocked his head towards Toad.

"I don't think anyone else followed that," Toad replied. "At least not at the hotel where we landed."

"Arr, that Toadette and 'er Shy Guys? They never follow that, mateys. Scurvy!"

"Okay," Toad responded with uneasiness. "And what's this?" He pointed to a weird transparent box filled with odds and ends.

"That? 'Tis the Boogie Booster, mateys! 'Tis for yer ship! Ya not buying that, though!"

"How do we get it, then?" Toad asked.

"Ya barter for it!" Lakisteven answered. "With good, old-fashioned Cheep Cheeps! Ya fish for 'em, and if they are enough, ya get the Boogie Booster! If not, ya walk the plank—but I don't have one! Arr, a Cat-o'-Nine-Tails will do in a pinch."

"At least I can fish," Toad said as he accepted the challenge.

Toad and Lakisteven set themselves up with fishing poles and buckets on the shore. They dipped their poles into the water and started fishing. Lakisteven hummed a tune as he started fishing, and Toad listened to it.

Lakisteven ended up catching 15 Cheep Cheeps, with Toad catching 10.

"Impressive," Lakisteven remarked as he looked at Toad's catch. "'Tis enough for me. Ya get da Boogie Booster!"

"Thank you," Toad replied.

"Anything else ya want to get?" Lakisteven asked as usual.

"No, thanks," Toad answered.

"Arr! I'll see ya again!" Lakisteven said as Toad and Mario left.

"Great," Toad commented when they reached the _S. S. Brass_. "Where's the installation instruction booklet?" He searched through the Boogie Booster for that, then found it wedged in a flap. "Here it is! Place on the special rectangular depression on the top of the _S. S. Brass_."

Toad went to the top of the ship with the Boogie Booster and installed it as the instruction manual had said. As soon as he had placed it there, the _S. S. Brass_ immediately became fancier. Music also started streaming out of the box.

"Hey, this sounds like what Lakisteven hummed," commented Toad as he walked back down to the navigation panel.

The navigation panel had some new widgets attached to it ever since Toad last looked at it. Mario was twiddling a switch on it with boredom, while a crewmember screamed with every flick of the switch.

"Stop that! Set it back to what it was before!" Toad disciplined Mario, lifting the white-gloved finger off the switch. After that, Toad steered the ship down the whirlpool and into a glowing cave.

Mario and Toad got out of the _S. S. Brass_ and walked into the strangely water-free cave. In it, the Music Key glowed—but only in a circular pool guarded by a huge, angry Blooper.

"Oh no," Toad muttered.

The Blooper replied something in a squishing, splashing language.

"I think it means that we can't get the key without a good dance to impress it," Toad translated feebly. "Mario, it's your turn!"

Glad to do something for once, Mario started dancing a jig. The Blooper replied with a spray of ink-filled music notes.

"Oh no, it doesn't like what you're doing," Toad told Mario.

Mario switched to a minuet, and soon the Blooper was lulled. It even swayed along as Mario danced. Finally, the Blooper scooped up the Music Key and threw it to Mario.

"That must have been a nice dance!" Toad remarked as they went back to the _S. S. Brass_ with the Music Key. "Now, where to go next?"

Mario pointed to a night-filled glimmer called World 3.

"If we're going there, fine," Toad responded as he flew the ship to the next world.


	4. World 3

Disclaimer: I don't own Hammer Bros., Luigi Circuit, Baby Park, _Donkey Kong _(the arcade game), Boos, the Music Keys, or Jumpman.

* * *

**World 3**

As Toad and Mario entered World 3, Mario noticed and pointed to the large amusement park that took up nearly all that world.

"Of course we'll be going there," Toad replied. "Where else could it be?"

Toad and Mario soon disembarked the _S. S. Brass_ and entered the fairground—or rather, were about to.

A lone pair of Hammer Bros. was standing guard at the gates. Amazingly, admission seemed to be free, but these trained Koopa Troopas weren't about to just let the duo pass.

"Would admission normally be free if you weren't there?" Toad had the courage to ask.

"Yes," the larger Hammer Bro replied, "but you had to pay time in order to enter. Right now, while we're standing guard, you have to pay both time and calories! And you might have to pay with your fitness, too."

"How does that work?" Toad asked again.

The smaller Hammer Bro eagerly answered, "You have to dance while we throw hammers at you! Ha ha ha!"

"Is this reasonable?" Toad asked further.

"Yes," the larger Hammer Bro simply replied.

"Can't we wait until your shifts are over?" Toad asked yet again.

"Yes, but we aren't leaving for an hour yet," the smaller Hammer Bro responded.

Toad redirected his gaze to Mario. "Mario, do you think we should try to gain entry now or later?"

Mario was brave (or should we say foolish?) enough to reply by dancing. The Hammer Bros. immediately sent a barrage of hammers straight at Mario. The dancing plumber dodged them all.

"Argh, we must try again!" the bigger Hammer Bro yelled as he loaded his arms again.

The Hammer Bros. missed twice as Mario kept on dancing.

"We can't let him enter the fairground that easily!" the smaller Hammer Bro cried.

"Then get out the exploding hammers!" his elder brother bellowed.

The Hammer Bros. sent out a volley of exploding hammers. They blew up and made a wonderful explosion, but Mario was only singed slightly by the attacks as he kept on dancing. Toad, however, bore the brunt of one of the blasts and had his clothes scorched off.

"I'll be back soon!" Toad cried as he ran back to the _S. S. Brass_ to get more clothes.

After Toad successfully put on his clothing and came out of the _S. S. Brass_, the Hammer Bros. were surprisingly non-aggressive.

"Fine, we'll let you both pass," the elder Hammer Bro declared as he opened the gates.

"I gotta admit, that red-capped guy has the best dancing I've ever seen for someone who wanted admission…" the younger Hammer Bro remarked.

Mario and Toad passed through the gates and ran to a ticket booth.

"We'd like twenty tickets, please," Toad ordered.

"That'll be fifty coins," the Toad clerk replied.

Toad paid the clerk the required coins and they got the tickets. The twosome immediately ran to a popular roller coaster.

"This one seems to be a recommended ride, according to this World 3 Fair brochure," Toad told Mario as they ran to the roller coaster's long line-up.

After fifteen minutes of waiting in line, Toad and Mario finally got a chance to ride the roller coaster.

"Seven tickets, please," the Shy Guy clerk ordered as Toad paid up. "Thank you," the Shy Guy replied as he opened the bar-door.

Mario and Toad walked to a roller coaster car, pulled down the safety bar, and held on tight. The two of them screamed as the ride started and the music from Luigi Circuit of Mario Kart: Double Dash played in the distance. This soon changed to the Baby Park theme music as the roller coaster train did a loop-de-loop.

After the ride, Toad felt like throwing up. Mario did too, and the pair ran to the washroom and vomited into the sinks.

Mario, surprisingly, decided to check out the haunted house. Toad followed him, and they both went into the haunted house's line-up.

"One ticket for the scariest time of your life!" the Boo clerk cried out.

Toad reluctantly paid the required tickets and walked through the doors with Mario.

In the haunted house, things were initially going along smoothly. Skeletons popped out of nowhere, Boos did too, and eerie music was heard. That was, until Toad noticed some music from the video game _Donkey Kong_.

"That sounds like an arcade game," Toad commented. "Should we go there?"

Mario made no reply, so Toad yanked him to the music's source.

In that particular room, a Boo was playing _Donkey Kong_ on an arcade machine. Another Boo was watching, and yet another Boo was offering criticism.

"You can't play that game with the volume on like that!" the third Boo complained. "That isn't scary music at all!"

"Come on, this game is fun!" the Boo playing the game protested back.

"This is an outrage!" Mario wrote into a sheet of paper. "They release a game involving a copy of me called 'Jumpman', a totally wrong characterization of DK, and some woman I don't even know! This is all wrong!"

"You can keep that to yourself," Toad replied to Mario's writing.

Toad and Mario soon came out of the haunted house, sorely disappointed about its scaring abilities. They looked around, until Toad's naturally keen senses caught sight of the glimmer of a Music Key.

"Hey, I think the Music Key's that way!" Toad exclaimed as he yanked Mario to a large Ferris wheel. Mario did not resist Toad's tug.

When Toad and Mario arrived at the Ferris wheel, Mario looked up and gasped—and that moment was one of the only times that Mario emitted a noise from his mouth. Toad didn't gasp, but he knew Mario would.

The person Mario saw in the Ferris wheel was Wario, the long-time rival of Mario and the older brother of Waluigi. Wario was currently carrying a Music Key in his strong-gripped hands. He was currently enjoying his ride, and he wasn't letting go of his key.

"Oh, man…" Toad groaned. Mario shared Toad's feelings, but didn't utter a sound.

When the current Ferris wheel ride was over, Wario came out and walked towards another ride. Toad took that perfect opportunity to say, "Wario, do you know whether we can get that Music Key back now, please?"

Wario screamed, "No! Of course not! You can't possibly get that!"

Toad easily replied, "I'd say Mario here has good enough dancing to deserve that key, not you."

Wario then howled, "Fine, then! A dance-off it is! I say I have good enough dancing to keep my Music Key, and I will!"

Mario took the first step. Wario replied with his first step, and the two cousins officially started their dance-off. Wario danced rather clumsily, and when Toad tried dancing along, Wario danced even worse than Toad. Mind you, Toad isn't a very good dancer, even though he is competent. Mario, on the other hand, danced like a star.

"That confirmed my statement," Toad remarked as they all stopped dancing.

"As the unbiased judge," a passing Koopa Troopa that was getting off the Ferris wheel announced, "I say Mario wins!"

"Confirmed again," Toad commented. "Now can we please have the Music Key?"

"I don't think that was enough to get my Music Key," Wario answered.

"We'll see whether this is enough," Toad responded as he easily pulled the Music Key out of Wario's hands and gave it to Mario.

"You caught me off-guard!" Wario bawled. "How could you!"

Toad quickly whispered to Mario, "He's going to be distracted for a while yet."

The two of them swiftly ran out of the site and exited the fairground. As Wario kept on fuming, Toad and Mario embarked back on the _S. S. Brass_.

"Now we need to find World 4," Toad announced. "Where is it? Oh, there it is!"

Toad steered the ship to World 4, hoping to grab the last Music Key.


	5. World 4

Disclaimer: I don't own Cheep Cheeps, warp pipes, Podoboos, Ms. Mowz, Freezies, Music Keys, and/or bobsleds.

* * *

**World 4**

Mario and Toad disembarked the _S. S. Brass_ and landed on World 4. They might have done it a bit early, because they were both shivering. After all, World 4 was a bit—no, extremely cold! They both shivered so much that they went back to the ship and got some winter clothes on.

After bundling up and coming out of the shop again, Toad looked up and remarked, "Wow, that's a high climb. I can see the Music Key at the top, but isn't this a bit steep?"

Mario nodded and agreed. The two of them then tried to find a warp pipe system.

"Hey, I see one!" Toad announced as he pointed out a green pipe.

The duo hopped through the pipe and ended up in a frozen sewer system. They then tried to find a pipe out. Toad decided that the best way to accomplish this was to ask the nearby Cheep Cheeps.

"Hello, Cheep Cheep," Toad tried asking. "Can you please tell out the way out?"

The Cheep Cheep pointed to a narrow pipe.

"Thanks," Toad replied as he dragged Mario to the pipe. Unfortunately, that one just ended up back in the same sewer system.

"Drat!" Toad cried. "We'll try again." He then asked another Cheep Cheep to point the way out.

"It's this way," the Cheep Cheep replied as he pointed to the left.

"No, it's that way!" another Cheep Cheep shouted as she pointed to the right.

"Hey, it's up there!" still another Cheep Cheep pointed out with an arrow sign.

"Can anyone decide?" Toad groaned.

Mario leaped up the pipe that the Cheep Cheep with the arrow had pointed out. He promptly disappeared.

Toad followed Mario up that pipe. Luckily, it did lead outside, and the two of them dusted themselves off as they walked to a cottage.

"It's still cold," Toad shivered. "Should we warm ourselves up over there?"

Mario nodded, and the pair walked into the cabin.

A fireplace (without the fire) was waiting for them inside.

"We'd better light that fireplace up," Toad stated as he looked for anything that could ignite easily. "Where's the gas switch?"

Toad searched high and low for the gas switch, but eventually he realized that there was none. He then asked a passing Podoboo, "Can you please light up the fireplace?"

The Podoboo jumped into the fireplace and disappeared up the flue. Music also came down the flue. Inevitably, the two of them had to collide.

A thud, followed by a crackling noise, was heard in the cabin. Soon afterward, a Mouser that Mario recognized and the Podoboo came crashing down.

"Ms. Mowz!" Mario scribbled down on his now-thawed piece of paper.

"Ouch, my legs…" Ms. Mowz stopped humming and started yowling in pain. The fireplace crackled further, burning the two of them more severely.

As Ms. Mowz hopped out of the fireplace and into the rest of the cabin, she limped on one leg and kissed Mario on the cheek. "Why, my little hunk!" she greeted.

Mario swooned, then fainted.

Toad screamed, "What's happened?" He then tried to shake Mario into consciousness. It didn't work.

"Help!" Toad yelled. "We need help!"

A motley crew of Podoboos, firewood, and dinner plates came to Toad's aid. They ignited, smashed themselves on Mario's face, and waved themselves at Ms. Mowz.

"What have I done wrong?" Ms. Mowz asked as she fell backwards into the dining table.

After gathering a few splinters and shards in his face, Mario finally revived. He slowly got up and scribbled, "How long was I out?"

"Precisely forty-three minutes," Toad responded and he pulled Mario up. "Here, I think we're warm enough now."

Toad and Mario promptly left, leaving Ms. Mowz with the Podoboos, and trudged up the mountain. A couple hours (and some complaints by Mario) later, they finally reached the summit! They got to their feet and looked straight at a giant Freezie.

The Freezie looked far over the horizon, never acknowledging Mario and Toad's presence. So Mario and Toad waited. And waited. In the end, Toad asked, "Can we please get that Music Key from the top of your head? I'm sure you don't need it."

The Freezie did not reply.

"Hello?" Toad asked again. "Did you even hear me?"

The Freezie made no motion and did not utter a sound.

"Are you a non-speaking antagonist?" Toad asked further. "You do less things than Mario over here."

With that, Mario beckoned the Freezie into a dance competition.

The Freezie did not attempt to dance.

Mario didn't like an opponent that was unwilling to participate, so he made and chucked a fireball at the Freezie.

The Freezie started to melt, but did not otherwise move.

Mario threw another fireball at the melting Freezie. The Freezie did not respond.

Eventually, the Freezie had melted to the ground, and still it did not make a reply. Mario threw his last fireball into the huge puddle, and still the former Freezie did not react.

Toad picked up the Music Key, showed it to Mario, and pronounced, "Now, we have to go back! But how can we? We need to do so quick."

The answer came in the form of two bobsleds. They zipped up to the twosome and scooped them into their hulls. Then, they slid down the slope.

"Wheeeee!" Toad screeched as he rumbled down the mountain.

"This is fun!" Mario wrote into a piece of paper.

The two bobsleds couldn't stop fast enough, so they smashed twin holes into the _S. S. Brass_. Mario and Toad were soon flung inside.

"Ow!" Toad yelped. "Can we fix this ship fast enough?" He then looked back, and saw that the Boogie Booster was busy fixing the gaping holes. The bobsleds receded back and soared up the mountain.

After the Boogie Booster was done, Toad remarked, "Now, we'd better bring those Music Keys home! We're going to World 1!"

The _S. S. Brass_ returned the way it came as it zoomed back towards World 1.


	6. World 5

Disclaimer: I don't own Bullet Bills, Bombshell Bills, Bill Blasters, koans, hoedowns, gargoyles, Bowser's airship, and definitely not Shigeru Miyamoto. I wish I had good ideas for games like he has, though.

* * *

**World 5**

Mario and Toad soon reached World 1, happy that they had finally managed to get their Music Keys home.

"Yes! We did it!" Toad exclaimed as Mario carted away all four Music Keys and carried them to the Truffle Towers. After Mario shut them away, Toad stayed where he was to keep watch.

"Can I go home now?" Mario wrote.

"Yes, of course," Toad replied as Mario walked back to his now-reconstructed temporary house.

Night soon came, and a menacing shadow came to the twilit World 1. Of course, if a shadow comes and no one sees it, did it make an image? Neither Toad nor Mario would ever figure out this koan, though, as they were asleep when that shadow came and swept all the Music Keys into its guard.

When Toad woke up the next morning, he looked back and saw that the Music Keys were gone…again!

"Oh, no!" Toad screamed as he ran towards Mario's house and banged on the door.

As Mario opened the door, he scribbled, "What's wrong?"

"Someone stole the Music Keys again!" Toad howled.

"Is there anything in the sky?" Mario wrote more sedately.

Toad looked up and saw the _S. S. Brass_. He also saw what suspiciously looked like one of Bowser's airships.

"Actually, yes," Toad replied. "Can we follow the dark ship up there?"

Mario nodded, and the two of them hopped back into the _S. S. Brass_ and made chase.

The _S. S. Brass_ breezed through Worlds 1 through 4 before heading into World 5. At World 5, Toad noticed that something mysterious was happening.

"The ship jolted!" Toad shouted after he was horribly shaken. He ran down the stairs and found Mario asleep on the navigation panel. His head had just depressed a large button.

"Stop sleeping on that boiler button, Mario!" Toad chastised as he lifted Mario's head off the panel. The jolting stopped…for a while. Soon, another jolt came and rocked the plane-ship. This time, Toad knew the boiler button wasn't to blame. He ran outside and saw a nightmare.

Bullet Bills and Bombshell Bills were flying everywhere, with Bill Blasters as support. A Bullet Bill had just hit the ship, which had caused the most recent jolt.

"Aagh, we'd better dodge them!" Toad screamed as he rushed back and shook Mario violently. "Mario? Mario?"

But Mario was as asleep as a hibernating squirrel, as immovable as a mountain, and as resistant as gold (which is surprisingly resistant to most chemicals). This left poor Toad to dance away the Bullet Bills.

So Toad tried dancing. It was modest at first, as he tried a slow waltz. But soon, he was leaping across the room, jumping into the navigation panel, and even smacking into Mario. Indeed, Toad got so dizzy that he didn't know how many times the _S. S. Brass_ was hit by Bullet or Bombshell Bills. (It was actually none after that initial one.)

The plane-ship soon came to rest after it had chased Bowser's ship into the enemy's temporary castle. Toad dragged a still-asleep Mario out into Bowser's throne room, when the pair found that they were almost too late.

Bowser was attempting to summon the power of the Music Keys right in front of them, and as the Spikoopa began his incantation, Toad decided not to bother waking up Mario, as it would take too much effort. Instead, he snuck into the canopy of the room and tried to take back the Music Keys he saw glinting at the top.

It took an unexpectedly long time to get to the top, but Toad managed to grab all the Music Keys and sneak back to Mario before Bowser finished speaking. The evil Spikoopa had somehow managed to notice, though, as he stood there with a miffed expression.

"What has happened?" Bowser bellowed. "That was supposed to be perfect! Who took my Music Keys?"

"I can't exactly call them 'yours'…" Toad responded to Bowser's far left.

Bowser wheeled around and saw a Music Key poking out of the darkness.

"Why you Key-stealer!" Bowser roared as he marched towards the Music Key, which was where Toad and Mario were.

With every stomp and growl Bowser made, Mario finally awakened. He rubbed his eyes and made slight murmuring sounds.

"You better dance!" Toad cried. "I managed to get the Music Keys back, but you better calm Bowser down! He's angry!"

With one mention of the name "Bowser", Mario sprang into action and started dancing. Bowser also started to dance, and he soon did the samba. Mario copied that. Bowser then switched to a passepied. Mario did that, too. Bowser saw that and changed his dance to a lively jig. Mario changed his dance along with Bowser, and soon skipped onto a switch on the middle of the floor.

A rocket shot out of a secret window in the throne room. It homed in on the dancing twosome, and Toad was worried that it would hit Mario. Instead, it veered to the closer person and hit Bowser in the butt.

Bowser was sent soaring with a rocket up his butt, as he uttered curses that would require severe censorship in any language. Mario stopped dancing, and both Toad and Mario looked up at the hole in the ceiling that the rocket and Bowser had created. They then ran out the door with the Music Keys.

The duo soon found Bowser in an agonized state. The Spikoopa was groaning and moaning, but soon started speaking in a strained voice. Toad then asked Bowser, "So why exactly did you do this?"

Bowser soon moaned back, "I got those Keys…to fix…my tone deafness…I wanted…to finally hear…my stepson Ludwig's pieces…as they should be…"

"Oh," Toad replied. "Quite frankly, I like Felix T.'s pieces better, but I guess Ludwig von Koopa can't be that bad at music."

As Toad finished his sentence, he looked to his right, and he saw Mario throw all four Music Keys into the air. The Keys spun in slow sequence, hovering in the air.

"What are you doing, Mario…?" both Toad and Bowser asked simultaneously when the Music Keys burst into flashes of light.

Instantly, the gloomy atmosphere and Bullet Bills disappeared off the face of World 5, to be replaced with a sunny sky and innocent gargoyles. The remaining Bombshell Bills exploded in huge flares as grass grew, lava turned to water, and trees gave fruit.

As that happened, Toad noticed a certain music in the air. Then Mario heard it, and even Bowser heard it as his tone deafness was somehow cured.

"Hey, this actually cured me," Bowser commented as he got up and the rocket fell off his butt.

"This music's great!" Toad exclaimed as he started dancing to it.

"I feel like dancing, too!" Mario scrawled in rhythm to his dancing.

"I better dance to this!" Bowser remarked as he danced, too.

Soon enough, everyone was dancing, from World 1 to World 5. The Cheep Cheeps swam in loop-de-loops, the Shy Guys stopped their work and did a hoedown, and Toadette danced to her favourite music. Waluigi put on his dancing shoes and tap danced, too. Even the flowers and trees started swaying in harmony and rhythm to the music that now permeated the air.

It was certainly a moment to savour. And one that was worth sacrificing the Music Keys for. Also, now that the Keys were gone, no one could steal them anymore. It was idyllic.

And that was when Bowser got a cell phone call from Shigeru Miyamoto…


End file.
